50+ Funny Wedding Wishes, Messages and Quotes

Funny Wedding Wishes: Wedding can be pretty stressful, so why not lighten up the mood by sending some funny wedding wishes to your close and dear ones? Wish them onward madness and craziness together. Congratulating the newly married couple by sending some funny wedding messages will be a way to make fun. Do not forget to give them your blessings and best wishes for all the fights they are signing up for in the lifetime. Here are some funny wedding wishes you can send to your best friend, siblings, cousins, relatives, or colleague on this joyous occasion. Enjoy the magical day and bless them with your presence and funny yet heartwarming congratulatory words.

Funny Wedding Wishes

Best of luck for your lifetime suffering. Have peace with each other. Congratulations!

Congratulations on convincing yourself to settle down. May the crazy days start!

I am happy that you are married now. Congratulations for being expensively stupid.

Thank you so much for giving us a day to chill. Today is a wonderful day to be married! Congrats.

I’ll tell you the secret of a happy marriage. It remains… a secret to all! Wishing you all the best for the times ahead!

Congratulations and best of luck on continuing to ignore the little annoying things.

I knew you two were madly in love with each other but didn’t think that you’ll be mad enough to marry. Have a great life ahead.

No amount of wishes or luck will protect you from the painful life of slavery you are about to start as a husband. Congratulations anyway.

Two become One: one bed, one remote, one bathroom! Congratulations on your union as life partners!

You are actually shown some respect when priests ask you to say ‘I do’. Else it’s not that you have any other choice either. Happy Married Life Ahead!

Your laughter will be dead, Your rejoicing will be nullified. There’s going to be just one voice at home now, And that is of your wife’s. Happy married life!

I would like to send you my best wishes on your lifelong contract. Congratulations!

Hope you will not grow up just because now you are married. Have a blessed and happy life.

Congratulations on your wedding, may you always be able to put up with each other!

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Marriage – the lone warfare where you have to sleep with your enemy and the next day you have to talk happily without caring how much you were disturbed last time. Good luck. Happy Marriage.

A couple’s life cycle consists of various stages: dating, loving, marrying, fighting, threatening, and possibly even divorcing. Congratulations on reaching step number three.

Funny Wedding Wishes for Friend

Just wanted to remind you that deaf husbands and blind wives make the best pairs. Hope you have a great married life with your partner. Sending you all my best wishes, mate.

Dear friend, congratulations on getting married for real. Hope you speak now or forever hold your peace! May God be with you throughout all the bumpy ride.

Hope you stay madly in love, just don’t get ‘mad’ in this marriage. Best wishes for the crazy, wonderful, and dangerous world of “marriage”. Sending my prayers.

Congratulations on your nuptials. I am really happy that you have found your person you want to annoy for the rest of your life and be happy about it. Love you two so much.

There is nothing worse than a friend getting married. Now my parents have one more reason to coax me into getting married. Congratulations.

In the circus of life, you may have lived like a lion so far. But your wife, the new circus master will tame you into a domesticated cat in no time. Good luck with your tight rope act.

Congratulations for embarking on life’s journey called MARRIAGE which is either a two way street between COMPROMISE and SACRIFICE or a one way street to DIVORCE.

I canceled all my appointments and an important meeting just so that I could make it to your wedding. After all, free food and booze were just too lucrative to give up. Congratulations.

Well, now it’s the beginning of the end for you. No more beers, no more night out with the guys but at least you have a loving wife. Congrats!

Do you know what late nights, parties and hanging out with friends on the weekend have in common? You won’t be able to do any of those from now on. Congratulations for your wedding.

Funny Wedding Wishes for Brother

FINALLY! I mean, yeah, congratulations on your wedding. I hope your life drama be more comedy than some melodrama. Good luck with everything. Best wishes.

I hope you enjoy the circus of this lifetime and make sure to squeeze the fun out of it. Stay in love, stay married. Also- remember to SCREAM whenever it is needed. Love you, tons.

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May you enjoy your epic sleepover with your person for the rest of your life. I pray to God to keep both of you safe from each other. Have a great life together. Love you.

Marriage marks the end of a love story and the start of a wrestling match. Wishing you the very best of everything anyway.

No one’s ever able to find out a secret about happy married life. I guess it doesn’t even exist. Happy Married Life Brother ;)!

Funny Wedding Wishes for Sister

I still cannot believe someone willingly married you. Sending all my best wishes and condolences for him to tolerate you 24*7. Hope you have fun together. Love yaa.

Hope you have fun at your personalized wrestling match for life. Best wishes, guys. May God bless you two together and be with you, always. Love you a lot.

Maybe your “I do” will not cost you- your sanity. Have fun in your married life. Sending my best wishes to both of you at surviving life. May God bless you, dear.

You are so excited to make your partner happy and loved always. Then you will find out that you did nothing but annoy each other instead. Congratulations!

Getting married is like becoming a child all over again. Be prepared to learn where to put your towel, how to keep the bathroom clean, and organizing your clothes in the closet. Congratulations.

Funny Wedding Wishes for Colleague

I hope God bless you with an amazing memory to remember all the important dates and not make your partner angry. Sending my best wishes at your marriage life, mate.

Thank you so much for the free food and drinks, I will always say my prayers to God for you. May He bless you at the beginning of the end for you. Congratulations, and good luck with everything.

Congratulations on your wedding day… I haven’t bothered buying you both a present. It would just be something else to fight over when you get divorced!

In life, we should always keep our eyes wide open. However, after marriage, it‘s better to close them! Congratulations and Good Luck!

Do you know that you are signing a marriage contract which does not give you the option of renewing it every year! Congratulations on signing your life away.

Funny Wedding Quotes

“A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor

“Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” – Erma Bombeck

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“Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia? The mafia wants either your money or life! Wives want both!”

“This is what I have to say to you. You are a very brave soul who will endure the marriage life and become better than all of us. Godspeed my friend. We got your back.”

“Before you got married, you were madly in love with each other. Now you will’be mad at each other as well.”

“When a man opens the car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.” – Prince Philip

“Marriage is when a man loses his bachelor’s degree and a woman gets her master’s degree.”

“There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.” – James Holt McGavran

“The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.” – Groucho Marx

“Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain’t so hot.” – Minnie Pearl

“Marriage: A legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of the opposite sex solemnly agree to harass and spy on each other for ninety-nine years, or until death do them join.” – Elbert Hubbard

“Love seems the swiftest but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.” – Mark Twain

“I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one’s wife happy. First, let her think she’s having her own way. And second, let her have it.” – Lyndon B. Johnson

“Getting married is like being in drama school. You get to practice everything from comedy to melodrama to tragedy. Congratulations.”

Some witty quotes and laughing off at them is the easiest escape from the stress one can be had from all the wedding preparation. Send some remarkably funny wedding wishes and make them enjoy their day to the fullest. Send them your warm wishes and good luck messages on their new job AKA being married. Wish them to have a happy married life no matter what. Send some silly and funny wedding messages to make them sure you are happy for them. Show them how happy you are on their new journey. Enjoy the food and do not forget to give them some presents. Enjoy the wedding and help them enjoy it from the best point of view.